#5: Boo! Did I Scare You?

Let’s talk about fears for a minute. If you were going to live on a boat with the intention of traversing the world for who-knows-how-many-years with your husband, two teenage sons, and a water-averse dog, what would you be afraid of? Running out of food in the middle of the Atlantic? Seasickness? Dealing with other countries’ laws? Being ill-equipped for medical emergencies? The boat springing a leak after an orca hits it? A bull shark thinking you look tasty in your shiny scuba diving outfit? A devastating storm wiping out everything? Your kids having so much fun that they neglect schoolwork and never amount to anything in society?! (Honestly, that last one I’m not worried about, but I am concerned that we won’t get around to much sailing before they fly from the nest.)

Before we decided on naming our catamaran Felicity, I might as well have named her Fear-Inducing Medusa. Have I told you I know almost nothing about sailing, but we’re still full-speed ahead with our plans?! I’m sure my lack of knowledge is the root of my fears and something I need to work on. In fact, this blog is going to be a regular therapy session for me as I randomly unveil what I’ve learned and/or what’s on my mind, from nautical nuggets such as how to reach Felicity (briefly explained in the previous blog post) to the occasional pondering about how to reach felicity (start by eating dark chocolate).

Ever heard of the saying “If it were easy, everybody’d be doing it?” Well, as far as I know, everybody’s “doing” life and I don’t know anyone who has hit a home run every time they’re at bat. That’s the whole point, isn’t it? To grow beyond our personal comfort zone by learning how to hit all the tricky curveballs. In my case, I decided to help build our catamaran and live aboard on the ocean because it’s totally different from anything I’ve ever done. However, I’m so far out of my comfort zone in the thought of it, I can really worry myself to death about what could go wrong in this venture. That used to happen in the middle of the night and I’d lie awake with all the torment in my head. One early morning after a few sleepless hours, I got out of bed and just purged my thoughts—especially fears—into my journal, thinking that would help. It might have, because I’ve been sleeping better ever since, although earplugs and a cooler temperature at night knocked sleeplessness out of the park.

To help with conquering the unknown, building our boat will be a hands-on method toward better understanding our upcoming ocean life. The years-long process will give us time to digest the ins and outs of our new home with each baby step. It will also give us bonding time as a family unit before we set sail and rely on each other as a team. We considered buying a used boat, but it wouldn’t have been exactly what we wanted and it would’ve likely needed a lot of tech upgrading and restoration anyway. Earlier this year, though, our indecision was put to rest when I asked our eldest at 13 years old if he’d rather buy or build. Tristan said he’d like to build the boat so he could understand how it all works. He thinks he might like to become a mechanical or electrical engineer, so this could prove to be a great experiential opportunity for him. And then there’s our younger son, Calvin, who would prefer to live in a customized new boat. So it’s unanimous! It’s been a year since this pic was taken, and I fear that time’s a tickin’ too quickly. . . .

Fears are just worries about problems that may or may not happen. I suppose every problem we encounter at sea will just have to be dealt with like everybody else living on land. The only difference is that we’ll be sailing under that bridge instead of crossing it. Hopefully. Alright, everybody, fingers crossed that our mast doesn’t hit any bridges that we come to! (Don’t mind me while I add that to my “Fears” list. . . .)

Now that I’ve given my fears a place to rest in my journal, I can focus on the good stuff: how interesting life on the ocean could be!